My Blog Has a New Home
If you’ve been reading my blog here at Hart Counseling Services, I wanted to let you know about a change.
My writing has moved to a new home: Conflict Capable Couples.
Over the years, my work with couples has continued to deepen and evolve — and so has what I find myself wanting to write about. I’m increasingly interested not only in helping couples when they’re struggling, but in helping people understand what actually happens between us when relationships get difficult.
How do two people who love each other become so stuck in the same painful pattern?
Why does something relatively small sometimes carry so much emotional weight?
What helps us stay connected to ourselves — and to each other — when our nervous systems would much rather defend, pursue, withdraw, fix, explain, or prove a point?
And perhaps most importantly: how do we become more capable of navigating the inevitable conflict, difference, vulnerability, and repair that come with loving another human being?
That growing body of work now has its own home at Conflict Capable Couples.
Hart Counseling Services will remain the home for my clinical work with couples — including intensives and couples counseling. Conflict Capable Couples is becoming the home for the ideas that grow out of that work: articles, reflections, practical tools, workshops, and resources designed to help couples better understand themselves, each other, and the patterns they create together.
The name is intentional.
I don’t believe the goal of a healthy relationship is to eliminate conflict. Two different people trying to build a life together are going to have differences, disappointments, misunderstandings, competing needs, old sensitivities, and occasionally very strong opinions about things that seemed entirely unimportant five minutes earlier.
The work is becoming more capable in those moments.
More able to recognize what is happening.
More able to stay curious when certainty would be easier.
More able to understand what lives underneath our reactions.
More able to repair when we inevitably get it wrong.
And more able to create the kind of relationship we want — not because we never lose our way with each other, but because we get better at finding our way back.
That is what I’ll be exploring at Conflict Capable Couples.
If you’ve enjoyed reading my posts here, I hope you’ll join me there. There is already new writing waiting for you, and much more to come.
Hart Counseling Services isn’t going anywhere. The blog just got its own house.
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